Nawabi Shaadiyan

I haven’t written in a long time.my apologies. i dont know why, lack of inspiration,being busy or too lazy,  writers block, or just a brain block, who knows.
anyway, right after eid, i had 2 weddings, one of my super duper close girl cousin’s wedding and my alhumdulillah, bff since 10 years’s wedding. so yeah it was hectic and shiny bling all around.
i dont really know where this is gonna go, but i sure hope to God i make some sense.

so these weddings were really different, although they should have been similar.
both arranged marriages, both girls were hyderabadi but raised up in the KSA. both guys were hyderabadi too, but settled abroad (bacha foreign ka hai ji).both marriages were in our very own beautiful city of hyderabad *marfa music*

one marriage was a ‘seedhi saadi’ masjid mein nikah affair followed by a reception the next day, and the other was a typical all out, sanchak in the marriage hall, and grand shaadi and reception.no, not grand enough for taj krishna, sorry to disappoint you, but grand enough as in one of the nicest marriage halls in the city hamdulillah.

for those of you who dont know, manjey is the first rasam/event which is the haldi thopo on the bride/groom.usually at home.(pakistani reference: maayoon i think, where n is noon e ghunna :P)

second up is the sanchak, where for the bride, the mother in law comes and puts this paste and that paste and gives her bahu to be, the shaadi ke kapdey and jewellery and more drameybaazi.for the guy, its hold his pinky for the money, and fight over it till his arm is about to fall off, and then argue over a price.usually the bride’s sisters do this and sometimes, the brothers.average time: 45-90 mins.good fun, but goes out of control sometimes,logaan jazbaati hojatey, and then its not halal either.(pakistani reference: mehendi, if im not wrong) this is actually the one that has the most draameybazi but i dont know what else to elaborate. oh right, the ladkey waaley get kishtiyaan for ladki, (clothes, bags, shoes, jewellery, barii – badam, misri, khopra,mithai i have no idea why except mithai. proly cuz it was expensive stuff and its like bringing over posh lindt/ferrero rochers chocolate in todays age) and ladki waaley get trays for dulha (clothes,bathrobe set, perfumes etc)

And then we have the shaadi day.woohoo. bring out all your jewellery and red clothes.yeh susst sheher mein shaadis start at 9:30-10pm, uptil 3am-ish and this is being fair, not talking about the super late lateefs.mind you, hamare paas, segregated rehtey shaadis, ladies alag, geints alag.detail mein bataatiun baadmein.if the ladka’s friends are really hyderabadi then theres a marfa and all that crazy junglee dancing thats so fun to watch and even more fun to dance. and then, the bride and groom come and sit on their respective stage, and everybody takes pics, and nikah ke baad u toss out misri badam from the stage so they can hit poor aunties heads and little kids around the stage. and then theres the race to the dinner table. no time for “aaiyye, khaane pe tashreef laaiyye”.then theres dulhan and dulhey ka table, which is STUPIDLY the last dinner for the night, so the stars of the day get all the cold food and leftovers.and of course, we have another awesome trend which is the videograpy in the dinner hall, so everyone feels awkward and we can all laugh and get embarassed about who ate how much later. and then back to the stage where the kids would have pulled off all the flowers by then.theres also that photoshoot, where the photographer puts up a white/black cloth wherever he can and then asks the bride and groom to pose like this and hand on ur chin for the bride, and hands in ur pocket for the groom and more dumb poses, in which he can add the moon and pearls and kashmir ke mountains later in the album

didnt i say we have segregated shaadis? yeah, theres a crew of 4 men zooming in and out on the dulhan, for video/photography.and then during the photoshoot they stand 3 meters away and ask the bride ghoonghat yahan se hatao, woh peechey karo, haath aagey rakho, face dikhra nai, aisa thairo.and they’ve basically cheked out the bride more than the groom will.and there is unka chota beta, whose not really chota, cuz hes 16, and then dulhey ka bhai jo intezaam dekhra tha, and then badey chacha who has to come to meet people.and etc ka bada beta who just come from america, so of course, he can come in to the ladies section to meet the ladies (read prospective mothers in law or rishta aunties).so yeah, thyre segregated. oh and the male waiters and food servers. khaali in logaanich, warna toh sirf ladies rehtey.

anyway after the photoshoot, the groom comes to the girls side,by this time only close relatives are left, phool pehnaatey and pehnaatey jaatey, ears tak aagaye tak, group pichurs (khaandaan pichurs), and then dulha dulhan photoshoot. then the dreaded moment, *babul ki duaaaein leti jaa* bidaii time. depending on the amount of people for family pichurs and rona dhona, this can stretch the wedding from 1 am-4am.and if the dulha is nice and the dulhan isnt comparatively much heavier, then our hero, will sweep the lady off her feet into the flowers waali gaaadi.

next day reception.late lateefi.start at 10-ish till 1:30-2. just more posing and pichurs. same dinner drama and photography drama.oh and less ladki waaley on stage, and around the dulhan, because ‘ab ladki unki hogayi na’ 😐

and so, happens a hyderabadi marriage. i hope im not leaving out anything, i’ll edit if i do remb. of course, there is more drameybaazi that happens with relatives like u never gave us an invitation card personally etc. and the internal relative disputes, but hey, whats a hyderabadi shaadi without all that?

and from my tone, im sure u figured out the certain things that really irk me, but inshAllah, a new post on that, about what is super stupid in hyderabadi weddings and how it should be instead.i needed a post preceding it,giving you guys a background story first. my credibility for that next post: 6 weddings in the last 18 months of best frnds or siblings, so yes i know what im saying 😀

take care, and drop by again 😀

 

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8 thoughts on “Nawabi Shaadiyan

  1. Lol you just write so wonderfully funny 😛 I loved reading the detailed review of both Shaadis ! Though I am a fan of seedhi saadhi masjid me nikkah thing lol but you know we have to follow the society traditions too…. Hate the Dramay baazi but still can't stop it ! Really excellent post once again… You will be rewarded InshAllah for bringing smiles on so many faces 🙂 Love xx

  2. Falak I LOVED reading this nawabi post! 😉
    That part of 'no time for ayen tashreef laen' and the rushing race to dinner, uff awkwardly Funny scenes.
    'The stars of the night get the left-overs' haha true. But its fine jab tak i dont get in that place. Phr I will probably call him and eat sab ke saath 😛

    The late-lateefs, the ajeeb har waqt photos kheechne waly log, and segregate weddings, all's relate-able and thus I enjoyed reading this so very much!

    -Maria

  3. Actually ladke k bhai's india me nahi the , isiliye wo crazy marfa nahi tha . Option available tha par wo Dulha ko hi pasand nahi tha , thought fr DJ night bt elders in the family disagreed to it , Ramzan khatam nahi ki shaitaan ku shuru kardere nd all ….

    _Shub Chintak 😛

  4. wow.i never gave it much thought. u took the part about the guy and the marfa way too seriously. and whether he does disco dance or naagin dance, its not my concern, cuz it is neither my wedding nor my husband 😛
    the point of the post was nawabipana and shaadiyan…hope you liked it anyway 🙂

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